Bermuda Hogges take on American stripeys I have a new inherited football team, the Bermuda Hogges. And on Saturday they play arch rivals, well my arch rivals anyway, Crystal Palace Baltimore, in the United Soccer League (USL) 2nd Division.

What? I hear you ask. Well let me explain. The USL is the 2nd tier of the Major League Soccer (MLS) league here in the United States. There are two divisions to the USL, the first contains such luminaries as Vancouver Whitecaps, Portland Timber and Charleston Battery. I can see you’re impressed, although the Vancouver Whitecaps do actually have quite a ‘soccer’ pedigree up there on the west coast of Canada, after 10 years as members of the defunct NASL, actually winning the title in 1979.

There is a straight promotion and relegation between USL 1 and 2, although money, and franchise bollocks still dictate which cities ‘gain a MLS team.’ The standard from what I have seen of USL 1 on the box, ranges from rubbish to down right shocking. However for those crazy soccer aliens in cities such as Portland, Minnesota, Seattle and Cleveland, this represents the only live action you are going to get, and therefore the crowds are habitually made up of families, ex-pats and local college kids.

There are a lot of players in the league from the Caribbean, South and Central America, some young, escaping their homelands and trying to create a sporting career for themselves in the States and some older on a (small) final payday it would seem. These foreigners are mixed in with a good sprinkling of former college stars not good enough for the MLS plus from what I have seen, people like you and me, who have a real job during the day, and just play as a pastime to earn a bit more cash.

I would say that the standard falls somewhere between what I have seen at Eastbourne Borough in the Blue Square Southern Conference, but that is USL 1 remember, not 2 in which my new boys the Bermuda Hogges compete, so I hate to think how bad it will be, but your daring Chicago Addick, will at some point, once settled on the island go along and give you a full report, you have my word.

I don’t know how Bermuda was invited into the American 3rd tier of professional soccer (Puerto Rico play in the 2nd tier). They only formed in 2006 and I do understand that the Hogges are taking the competition very seriously blooding players that appear in their national team, that are not playing overseas.

The Hogges are backed by none other than Bermuda legend Shaun Goater and coached by Kyle Lighbourne. They play homes games at Bermuda's National Stadium (capacity 8,500) and on Saturday host that horrible bunch of Yankee Nigels in just the 4th game of the summer season.

Palarse USA are owned by the Orange one, and overseen by his brother Dominic. You will like this, found on their website:

"Crystal Palace USA was created as a feeder organization to the world-renowned Crystal Palace Football Club in the UK. Crystal Palace USA is the first professional soccer team in the USA with a direct link to a professional English football (soccer) team. Crystal Palace Football Club (UK) is a $100,000,000 company founded in 1905 in south London."

See, what better way than to inherit a team, than to have a ready-made rivalry as a great reason to support them? Come on you Hogges.  ¶ 09:53